“Everyday, they ask me if I’m ready, I have nothing to say.”
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
We leave tomorrow. This will be my first time going on this journey, so it still hasn’t quite hit me yet. I was hoping to start documenting my thoughts & feelings earlier, finding the time has been difficult. I’m going to do my best to keep up this journal b/c I want this experience to be something completely memorable. Even now as I’m starting to write, there are so many thoughts racing in my mind & I want to capture them all. Breathe. Here goes iA (inshaAllah, God-Willing).
I haven’t done anything in the way of getting prepared. My parents had bags packed, ready to go, seated beside the staircase 2 months ago. Everyday, they ask me if I’m ready, I have nothing to say. I still can’t believe I’m actually going. This is truly a blessing & indeed an invitation from Allah SWT (Subhanahu wa Ta’ala, May He Be Glorified & Exalted). The entire process of planning this trip has been so smooth & easy. The cost almost didn’t even matter – after having paid for everything, I really don’t feel like anything was decreased from me, subhanAllah. Allah truly opens doors & is the best of planners. I was honestly skeptical about how real this was going to be until we got our passports & visas back. But even now, until my eyes look upon the ka’aba & I take that first breath of air inside the Haram, I won’t fully grasp it.
I’m looking forward to it. I’m honestly not worried or concerned by what people say about it. People have stories about how dirty or difficult or intense it will be. I’m sure I can handle it. I’m just concerned for my parents – not sure how well they’ll be able to keep up, but I’m sure we’ll be able to get through it iA.
What I’m most looking forward to is making du’a (supplication). Over the past few months, du’a has become my favorite hobby & past-time. So, Hajj is especially exciting, it’s like the big leagues for du’a. The majors :)
There are so many things I ask for, but really I just want what’s best in this life & in the Hereafter. I also love to make du’a for others – especially my loved ones. I’m excited about the 6 page du’a list I’ve got with names & du’as from other people. Ya Allah, make me one whose du’as are answered. Ameen.
I’ve been contemplating this past year & I’m so thankful for how blessed I’ve been. Getting to go on Hajj, getting a good job, having a good relationship with family – meeting new family, seeing Ali (my younger brother) do well in school & set out in a good direction, being financially stable, being healthy, being free from major problems, being able to get active & creative with side projects again. So many great blessings Alhamdulillah wa Shukr.